When Questions Deserve the Truth

When I ask you a question, I don’t want the answer you think I’m fishing for. I don’t want comfort, or agreement, or a polite evasion.

I want your truth.

Maybe it’s the Dutch in me. Although… even Dutch people sometimes say I’m too straightforward. But questions have weight for me. They’re not asked lightly. If I ask, it’s because I want to see the world through your eyes for a moment. And when the answer is softened or polished to please, that chance is lost.

We live in a time where truth matters. Not only the grand truths of science or justice, but also the everyday truths between people: what you believe, what you see, what you feel. These truths are often uncomfortable. They may clash with my own. But without them, curiosity has nowhere to go.

Curiosity is not about safety. It is about discovery. It means being willing to hear what unsettles, what challenges, what disagrees. It means risking mistakes and misunderstandings. But if our questions only invite the answers we want to hear, then curiosity shrinks into performance. The question becomes a ritual, and the answer a costume.

The art of asking questions has been celebrated for centuries. But the art of answering is just as important. To answer with honesty, not diplomacy. To risk being wrong, or unpopular. To resist the urge to decorate the truth for someone else’s comfort.

Because honesty, even when imperfect, is a gift. It gives us something solid to stand on. From there, curiosity can explore.

So here’s the practice:

• Ask questions with the courage to hear the real answer.
• Answer questions with the courage to be yourself.

We don’t need to agree. We don’t need polished certainty. What we need is the honesty that keeps curiosity alive.

Because every softened answer is a dead end. But the truth, even if it’s messy, awkward, or difficult, opens a door. And that door is where curiosity walks through.

So don’t tell me what I want to hear.

Tell me what you believe.

That is where real connection begins.

That is where we stop pretending.

That is where curiosity becomes powerful.